Creature of Habit

I'm not a big clothes kind of guy (I'm also hinting here that I'm not gay if you can believe that). I don't buy expensive designer items; my favorite store is Kohl's. My favorite t-shirt I got for free eight years ago, a 2002 youth softball league shirt, number on the back and everything. Having never played a game of softball in my life I have to lie when people ask me about it. "Yeah, I coached third base" when I just want to get to third base with the woman who asks me about it in the grocery store.

I've come down to my five favorite "outfits" for work (fuck, I said "outfits"). I wear the same five o's to work every week. I know I should switch it up. I have other clothes to wear, I just don't like them that much.

But it gets worse.

I wear the same five o's on the same five days every week. Monday is tan pants, red shirt. Tuesday is blue pants, blue/yellow shirt. If you came to my office on a casual Friday I'd be wearing a company shirt and jeans. Like clockwork.

I also havn't washed said clothes in over two months. I work in an office so it's not like I get sweaty or anything. Recently I've noticed a rather musky, manly smell coming from them when I put them on in the morning so I'm guessing they're about due to be washed.

My home attire schedule varies slightly from my work attire madness. Instead of having five o's, I have one. I've worn the same jeans, t-shirt and sweatshirt every night after work (assuming I'm not going out). I lift weights, shovel snow, lounge around, all while in these clothes.

I haven't washed these in two months either.