Meeting About Company Emails

FA: Did you ever look up that fund I had mentioned to you last week?

Me: Yeah, didn’t like it that much. Didn’t look like anything special.

FA: (jibber jabber about the fund’s outlook, insight, beta, meta, you get the point)

Me: Yeah…

FA: Oh, we’re having a meeting about you this afternoon.

Me: Why me?

FA: The meeting is about company emails and what our representatives should and should not be sending in emails. It’s not like we have a problem or anything, kind of a mandatory training, but Cindy said she’s going to bring you up and use some of your emails as examples of what some of our clients send in.

Me: [pumping fist in air] Sweet! I can’t tell you how flattered I am! Having another company have a meeting about my emails?! Seriously?

FA: Yeah, Cindy saw the one from yesterday with the nine inches comment. She usually isn’t supposed to read my emails. We have a 22 year old intern that I have to send every email to so she can print it off and put it in your file.

Me: Every single email?

FA: Every single one. It’s so we have a record in case you were to say you sent in a buy order for $10,000 and the email read $20,000. We’d have that in the file.

Me: How thick is my file?

FA: I’d imagine it’s getting pretty big.

Me: Wait up, you have a 22 year old intern there?

FA: Yep.

Me: And you have to send her a copy of every email?

FA: Yep.

Me: Hmmm…

[typing in the background]

Email: So, FA, what’s up with this 22 year old intern at your work? Think you could set me up with her? Think she’d put out? Can you lie and put in a good word for me? I hope I still remember how that sex thing goes.

FA: You know we could put that fund in your Roth, maybe sell some of your large cap funds and… [reading the email] What the… What are you doing?! I just got done telling you I have to…

Me: [laughing louder than you should in an office environment] I KNOW!!!

I love giving the FA some shit every once in a while. But, now that I know his emails have to go past a 22 year old intern…