Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Subs

I was on Circuit City’s website a couple weeks ago and stumbled upon this:


I did a little research and found the 10” subs were going for $60 a piece and the amp was worth $150. That’s $270 for the amp and the subs not to mention the enclosure. The package from Circuit City, completely assembled as shown, went for $150. Hell, I couldn’t turn that down. I got it, installed it, and tugged on my penis a little after hearing it for the first time. The $150 sub/amp combo sounds better than some of my past setups that have cost four times as much. (For the record, it’s a toss up between the best systems I’ve ever had: four 10” Rockford Fosgate Power Series subs – currently in my living room housed in custom tower speakers – with two 300 watt cheapo amps vs. two 12” RFPS subs with a Power Series amp that put out 1,000 real watts; that one used to make quarters jump a quarter of an inch on the roof of the 2002 Toyota Tacoma which I rolled and totaled with 3,000 miles on it.) It’s not like I drive around with the stereo cranked listening to Young Jeezy or anything. Strictly rock ‘n roll for me, buddy. I’m fucking Kid Rock white trash like that.

But the thing is I can’t really get on it as much as I’d like (kind of like with the womens). For one thing Milwaukee County has issued an ordinance that anyone can call in your license plate if they think you’re stereo is too loud and you get hit with a warning for the first time, a $100 ticket for the second, and life imprisonment (complete with big black lover) for the third. Yeah, that’s ok, I really don’t want to take it in the ass. Then there’s the problem with my listening habits. In the morning I’m listening to Bob ‘n Brian talking to Steve Czaben as he does his daily sports report. Driving home from work I’m partially in “da hood” for three of the six miles home so I don’t like to crank it then (I consider anything east of 35th and Wisconsin Ave. the hood – I know, I’m a pussy). That leaves me with 2.5 miles in which to crank the stereo. I don’t want to do it close to my house and I certainly won’t when the puppy’s in the car. So I have this $150 sub/amp combo that weighs a good 70 lbs in the back of my Jeep that I can fully utilize for five minutes a day and which decreases my gas mileage ever so little (when you’re getting a whopping 16 mpg another 1 mpg off doesn’t even make you flinch).

I tried looking for the receipt yesterday; couldn’t find it. I was tossing around the idea of returning it after I received my $600 economic stimulus check and blew it all at the casino the same day (we won’t get in to that here, way too depressing). (Fuck, like really depressing.) I’m afraid if someone tries to steal it they’re going to slice open the new $500 top I put on the Jeep. I thought of putting the $40 Bazooka Tube back in there instead but the Renter pointed out that someone would slice the top trying to get at either of the sub combos. The other downfall is that the new sub pretty much takes up the back half of the Jeep. With the new top I had to take the sound bar off the roll cage and stick it in the garage. I went out and bought two 6x9’s and two enclosures and they sit right behind the center console (I know, no stereo effect but it sounded the best there). The 10’s enclosure sits right behind those and that’s about it for storage space. If I wanted to go camping I’d either have to take the sub box out (and miss out on some quality highway crankage) or strap all the camping gear on top on the rear deck cover with bungee cords. But I guess if I can’t find the receipt I’m pretty much stuck with it. Don’t get me wrong, I like it a lot, but it’s not exactly something that I really need.

Something else I don’t really need: a second penis. While it would be kind of cool having something for my left hand to play with I’d never get anything done and develop carpal tunnel in both my wrists.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

1. If you charged it as anyone with 1/2 a brain does now-a-days they should be able to look up the transaction and at least give you store credit.

2. Don't give me that you don't like rap shit, I know you secretly have a crush on Sean Carter a.k.a. JAY-Z...


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