Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Pizza, Cheese, Rumble

Last night I ate a medium pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut at 9:00 while I watched the game. As I’ve mentioned before, my body doesn’t handle dairy products all that well. Knowing that I had an early morning meeting I had to hit the sack at the end of the third quarter, around 10:00. I swear my stomach rumbled the whole time from 10:00 to 11:00. I couldn’t even fall asleep because of the violent gurgling going on down there. And then I started feeling pressure. Not knowing whether it was solid or gas I let a little one slide. Thank God it was just gas!!! After testing out the process a couple more times I decided it was ok to let the big daddy go. The big daddy was, well, big. You probably could have seen the covers flowing in the breeze. Oh, and it stunk pretty damn bad. But it was my fart, I kind of enjoyed it.

After the game the Renter came home and knocked on my bedroom door. “See, I told you to take the ov… Oh, what the hell? What’s that smell?”

Please don’t tell me you’re still trying to figure out why a tall, handsome, well edumacated guy with a great personality is still single.

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