Update on the MRI

Since the NFL season is upon us it only seems fitting that the MRI results came back the way they did: inconclusive. I got a call from the doctor’s office today. I guess the radiologist thought it was a cartilage tear and my doctor thought it was the ACL. They’re going to go over it together and call me tomorrow (Wednesday). Either way I don’t think it looks good. The knee doesn’t hurt much anymore and the swelling has gone down but I don’t think either one of those injuries will heal on its own. I’m just hoping that if surgery is necessary that I’ll be off of crutches by the time the snow starts to fall. I’ve done that before, not fun.

What’s up with the New England Patriots? They only scored 34 points last night after scoring 38 in each of their first three games. Not that it mattered; they still won and covered the 8 point spread. I started the day up $6, ended the day up $11. Yeah, I laid the lumber on the Pats.

Sitting at the bar last night the Renter asked me what I was going to get her for her birthday. Boy, wrong question to ask me. I look at birthdays like I do Valentine’s Day: fuck ‘em. I don’t ask for or expect anything from anyone for my birthdays. It’s just another day for me, nothing special about them. I bought her breakfast but she’s lucky she got that. And I was hungry and needed a ride. Worked out nicely.

I wish I had some good, nasty stories for you but life on the corner has been pretty tame lately. Which isn’t a bad thing at all, kind of nice for a change. I haven’t been to the casino since the spending spree where I bought enough toilet paper to last me for three months. I haven’t puked or crapped my pants or peed in the kitchen sink in quite some time. I think I might be house trained now. Hell, the Renter’s DVD player hasn’t been working so I haven’t even whacked off in who knows how long (oh God, I do remember, twice last Thursday, it’s been four days now). Ladies, any takers to help me out? Seriously, get your emails in quickly, first cum first served. Anyone? Hello?

(Email must not be working.)

Anyway, tonight is weights and wash. I have a big ass pile of clothes in my room and I haven’t touched a weight since last Thursday. While I’ll be limited in the exercises I can do with the knee and all I still need to do something in order to keep my feminine figure intact. God I’d be an ugly woman, 6’5” and 230 lbs. Fuck.

But, sadly, I think I am picking up some feminine qualities. A week and a half ago I bought a 61” TV. I bought underwear and tp and deodorant and razors the same day. You’d think I’d be sick of the shopping thing. But then the unexpected came in the mail yesterday: 30% off coupon at Kohls. Besides the daily necessities that I buy at Walmart, Kohls is the only place I shop for clothes. Kohls is the only place where I can find jeans that are actually long enough for my chicken legs. Every day at work I’m wearing 100% Kohls clothes. I could use some new socks, shirts and pants for work. I could use some new jeans but there’s just one problem: the waist. My waist has been going down lately and I don’t know if it will keep doing that or what; kind of has a mind of its own. Unlike my stretch fit old man pants that I wear for work, jeans don’t stretch. And my ass was getting bigger (muscular) from doing squats but now that the status of the knee is up in the air I’m sure my ass will go back down to normal. Fuck, listen to me bitch, whine, and moan. I’m turning into a woman.

But I’m going shopping for 30% off!!! Wee!!!