Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Karaoke Freaks

What is up with karaoke and the whole karaoke crowd? This group of people will go to this bar on Monday, this bar on Tuesday, a different one on Wednesday, constantly following the karaoke DJs. Just a little lame? True, my opinion is a little biased, I completely hate karaoke. I know plenty of others who feel the same, leaving promptly when the strangers roll in and the bad singing starts. They turn the tranquil corner pub into an obnoxiously loud recording studio with some moron trying to sing a Michael Jackson song (like I really wanted to hear Michael Jackson). And of course they can’t just stand back in the corner and sing their MJ, no, they have to stroll around the room and make themselves visible (who the hell invented wireless mics?). I had one guy stand so close to me that I could hear his voice from his mouth over the insanely loud speakers. Can you say invasion of personal space? Dude, unless you have a nice rack, GET OFF MY ASS! So on karaoke nights I usually grab the seat in the corner by the door, shielded from the 8 foot high speakers and saving myself from watching some dude do a rendition of Mr. Roboto. Oh yeah, dancing and everything. Only problem with sitting in the corner is that the bar opening is right there. All these people who are ruining my nice quiet evening are standing right next to me getting drinks. Yes, I secretly want to spit in every one. No, not really, but when they bring up 5 empty glasses and put them right in front of me I get a little irritated. Granted karaoke does bring in a couple women and the guys who run the karaoke are pretty cool, it’s just not for me. I think I’m going to custom design a t-shirt and hand it out to my friends. “Yes, you’re in my bar. And yes, your singing sucks.” In smaller letters down below, “If you have a nice rack you can practice singing in my shower with me.”

2 comments:

Diarrhea of the Mouth said...

hmmm, do i have a nice enough rack to practice in the shower? tho i'm not so sure i wanna hear u sing.

B to the... said...

Trust me, I won't be the one singing, not sure you will be either, just screaming my name over and over (and over).