The Last Fart

Some of us know the physical makeup of a fart, might have it down to a science, if you may.  The rule is you can only fart so many times before the origin of the fart rears its ugly head.  And when it rears its head, well, you better hope you're sitting over a toilet when it happens.  Or at least be in the comfort of your own home.

I forgot to poop at work today.  That doesn't happen too often, I like to use company resources for such events.  And with the cafeteria food they serve there, most days it's really not an option.  When you gotta go...

Today it slipped my mind.  I pooped at home before I lifted weights.  But then the farts came, more than likely brought on by the cafeteria food.  First it was one, then two, then ten.  Eventually I knew I couldn't fart anymore without the source of the gas making an appearance, but I had already pooped at home once, couldn't waste my own resources for yet another one.

Much better to shit myself the next morning and wake up with this soggy yet somewhat crunchy feeling in my shorts.

No wonder why my dog wants to roll in my lap.