Updates

Just to keep you informed…

I’ve learned that when women say they are going to return something at the mall it really means they are going to return an item, exchange an item for a different size, and browse the entire store.

The Saturday before my birthday I had a list of things to do. I wanted to buy some weights, pick up a new TV and go to Walmart before the Final Four games started. I wanted to hit G’s bar for the games and his awesome chicken wings. Well, I was still feeling a bit out of it from the previous night (not hungover but still intoxicated). I decided on not getting the weights (who wants to carry 90lb dumbbells when they’re drunk?) and really wasn’t in the mood for Colder’s and the TV (I hate salespeople). The Renter drove out to the mall and I sat at the mall bar while she did her thing. Now I know Lane Bryant is a big store but who can spend an hour in there? By the time she got done I was getting a little buzzed up (had won a couple hundred at the casino so I had no problem paying $3 a glass for some nice tasty amber beer). To my surprise she was pissed at me. “My feet hurt. I’ve been walking around all over for the past hour. I’m not going anywhere till you go and get the car.” Like I’m gonna drive. Why she didn’t wear tennis shoes I have no idea. Eventually she got over whatever it was and we hit G’s bar. Just before the game started the FA showed up. A little while later the old roommate arrived. Then Mr. Fudd and his girlfriend. Then Shaky D. Then the Pollack. The Renter had gone in my phone and gotten numbers for all my friends and invited them over for a little birthday get-together. Then I understood why she was mad at me for not doing the other errands: I was getting pretty loopy by halftime of the first game. Birthday shots didn’t help anything either. All in all a good day though.

I actually shit my pants that day trying to fart. You’d think I would have grown out of that by now.

I got scolded by the corner bar’s manager for not having a birthday party that I didn’t know about at her bar.

I eventually did end up getting a 37” TV from Walmart for the outside window facing the deck. It fills up the window frame perfectly. Now if only the weather would cooperate and warm up so I could sit out there.

I paid the Renter $300 for her $500 credit at Colder’s (appliance, furniture, TV store). I sucked it up one night after work and picked up a 22” TV for my bedroom. Now I feel like a glutton. I have the 61” in the living room, the 37” for the deck, the Renter’s 20” tube TV in the basement by the weight room and the 22” sitting in the box in my bedroom. I don’t even have a cable outlet in my bedroom. Yet. Funny thing is if I’m in bed I more than likely won’t have my contacts in and won’t be able to see the TV anyway.

The new workout looks like this:

Day One

Flat dumbbell press – 90lbs x 10
Incline dumbbell press – 70lbs x 10
Flys – 30lb x 10 followed by presses till failure
Chin-ups – whatever I weigh ? x 8
Pull-ups – whatever I weight ? x 8
Dumbbell rows – 90lbs x 10

Day Two

Dumbbell shoulder presses – 70lbs x 8
Upright rows – 125lbs x 8
Overhead tricep raises – 95lbs x 10
Curling bar curls – 95lbs x 10
Shoulder shrugs – 90lbs x 40
Sit-ups

I’ll do that for Monday and Tuesday and repeat it on Thursday and Friday. You wouldn’t think doing one set of everything would be enough but I’m sore for a good two days afterwards. After three weeks of using the 90lb dumbbells on the flat bench press I’ve gone from seven reps to ten. Must be doing something right.

Bank of B is sick of lending money and not getting paid back in a timely manner. I have two people who still owe me money for the NCAA pool and I’ve already paid out all the winners. Not that I need it, just the principle of it all.

I have the Renter benching 75 lbs ten times on the flat bench (barbell). The other day I think I actually saw a tricep. Great improvement.

I did someone’s taxes dating back to 2004. I don’t know how far back he will get reimbursed, but all five years came out to $3,400 for the fed and state combined. How much of that do you think I’ll see for all my time and effort? Probably the same as the NCAA people.

I broke down and bought a Playstation 2. They’re down to $100 brand new and I never really had a game station growing up besides the original Nintendo. I went to the used game place and picked up 15 games. Now I stay up till midnight playing Mortal Kombat. Last Friday I got up to the bar at 9:00 and people immediately asked why I was still sober. I now let a video games interfere with my drinking. That’s just fucked up.

I have more tidbits floating around in my head, just a matter of remembering them when they pop in there. Till that happens…